SLEEP!! (3-D)

“Fuck it,” you say to the whole thing. Either way, this is way too much effort for a bear that just woke up from hibernation. Talking bear or no you just want some sleep. Ignoring the sounds coming from the woods you head back. But before long you hear more sounds as something is approaching from behind. With almost bear ninja like reflexes you spin around and pin whatever was stalking you. Taking a breath you see a minuscule little hunter under your paw, with his camouflage clothes and rifle staring back at you in fear. The smell of urine fills the air as he whimpers in fright.

Just seeing his face makes you fall back in laughter. “Jeez dude calm down,” you say trying to relax the little hunter. His eyes only widened at hearing a bear speak. “Yeah, I talk get over it hunter.” You say with a smirk. Unflinching he just holds up his gun and aims for your head. The laughter stops as you once again pin him to the ground. “Just because I let you live, does not mean I won’t to kill you,” you growl at the little man with a big gun. His eyes he sees death and passes out from the terror… or he may have had a heart attack. You have no idea, you’re just a bear.
To make the most of this opportunity you check his pockets for identification. Instead you find a wallet and car keys. Seeing as to how he may or may not be dead, you help yourself to those items and head over to the parking lot. Lucky for you since there is a car alarm attached to the keys. Once you get to the lot you simply click to see the lights flash and get into what is now your car. As you sit, you further inspect the wallet to see that this man kept the ATM pin written down on a card just in case he ever forgot. Can you say Ka-Ching!

You head to the store and take out all the money you can from the ATM. With that you buy a plane ticket and it isn’t before long that you are doing shows 3 nights a week in Vegas. The appeal of a talking bear that sings all the classics is overwhelming. You alone pull Vegas out of a recession and bring prosperity back to the desolate desert town. Now you live in the penthouse apartment and have 5 wives as you have become a polygamist. Far from the woods you have finally found just where you belong.


The End