Sure adventure is what you wanted,
Not sure about a cave that’s haunted.
Something more fun, wonderous and merry,
Less of the dark, spooky and scary.
So you bow out and go on your way,
A bear in search of an end to his day.
Maybe a swing, seesaw or a ride on a slide,
Buy a ring, crazy straw or a tranny named Clyde.
Something with less rope and less danger,
Okay let’s keep the former and hog tie a stranger.
While walking around you hear a loud snap,
Look down to see your leg in a trap.
First you roar, then wail and shout,
But no one comes so then you pout.
Stuck for days with no food or drink,
Famished while your leg starts to stink.
Afraid that it has become infected,
All the sane ideas then get rejected.
Gnawing off your leg will surely set you free,
You’ve been stuck too long and won’t drink pee.
With a few bites and a chew,
You do what you have to do.
Scream and cry out loud with shouts of pain,
There’s a line you crossed and are no longer sane.
Eventually you finish and your leg is loose,
And just then humans appear from behind a spruce.
They heard the cries and came to help,
But their terrible timing makes you yelp.
Seeing the condition you’re in they help you to your feet,
I should say foot as the other is a stump and not neat.
Make it back to camp and they cauterize the wound,
You watch the surgery as your leg is pruned.
Spelunking would’ve been a good time,
But at least all this happened with a good rhyme.
The End
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