Of course there has to be a completely logical explanation for all this. Not everything is so arbitrary that I don’t even know what’s going to happen as the writer… not at all. So you try to go through the place again, only this time with those squinty eyes detectives have in all those TV shows. This means you’re paying attention only more… which should help the situation.
Before you find anything a well dressed and probably insanely wealthy man walks in. “You sign the contracts yet?” Confused you just look back not knowing what to say. The longer you stare the more your head begins to tilt to one side. The awkward silence is broken by the man bursting into laughter. “You were right; this bear is hilarious, good call.” “I know,” I replied. “Once I saw him I knew the potential. So have you received my script changes for the pilot?” “Got ‘em,” the man replied with a thumbs up as he walked out of the cabin. FYI, That was Ira Blowitz. He's one of the most powerful producers this side of the Adirondacks.
I probably should have told you before, But you're going to be on TV now. We were just so busy before that I forgot to mention it, everything happened so fast. Regardless, now you are the start of a new kids variety TV show. The novelty of a talking black bear hits a lot of key demographics. Not to mention the urban community and that’s a hard one to pick up. So get to make up we have a lot of work ahead of us... And ask Sally in wardrobe to get you a bow tie, but nothing to bright.
The show starts off with a bang, the premiere ratings of the pilot ranked as one of the highest rated premieres of kids TV shows in years. You even beat out the show for that teen idol who cooks, performs heart surgeries, sings and acts as a defense attorney. Now that mean little bitch hates you, but fuck her we’re rich.
Before you know it Ray the bear lunchboxes, clothes, camping gear, book bags, action figures… hell even candy and condoms are made with your face on it. They even give you a cereal, so eat a dick cereal tiger. After the raging success of the first season you do a summer film, which destroys box office records. Paparazzi start to follow you everywhere, and any midly attractive woman in town throws themselves at you.
As the seasons continue your novelty dies down. The last movie you did went straight to DVD and it didn’t help that the timeslot you dominated was taken away. The budget has been cut and no famous people even answer when called to do a cameo. As the director this has taken its toll on my expensive lifestyle and we need a comeback. My theory is do what the greats do, let’s get a sidekick. Someone to freshen things up a bit, maybe even add some drama… like a suicide or someone getting shot on the show? But I’m still in talks with the station on the latter latter ideas though. They did green light the sidekick idea, so let's start with that.
We had some interviews and narrowed it down to two choices, it's either a Hispanic Koala or British Kangaroo. They are both originally from New Zealand, which helps because those guys are half the price of American actors and twice as easy to deal with. As owner of 33% stake in the show Iam willling to listen to your suggestion.
Hispanic Koala (6-O)
British Kangaroo (6-P)
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